I’m overcoming social anxiety problems, but still have issues with going out in public alone?
I’m 20. I’ve been dealing with social anxiety problems for a while, but I’m trying to overcome them, and have made a lot of progress lately.
I just moved to a new town, and don’t have many friends yet…I mainly only hang out with my roommates, but this is a college town, so they’re often busy with work or school.
I’d really like to go out more often, to do things and meet people….make more friends…but I often find myself home alone on my days off, and I have a mild phobia of going out in public alone. I’m fine when it comes to routine things like grocery shopping or errands, but there are a lot of things I’d like to do….that I wouldn’t mind doing by myself…if it weren’t for the fact that I feel totally uncomfortable doing ‘leisure’ activities in public by myself.
I don’t have many self-consciousness problems, but this is one thing I refuse to do unless I’m with other people…it’s a big problem.
Does anyone have any tips on how to feel more comfortable "going it alone?"
Great news, Steven!!!
You just got reported for being a total d**khead!!!!
Have a terrible day:)))
I’ll be a college freshman this fall. I’m also pretty much a loner. After eating at a restaurant and seeing a movie by myself, I’ve become much more confident about being by myself in public. A lot of people are uncomfortable with it at first, but, like everything else, practice makes perfect. Try walking in the park or seeing a movie (people will be focused on the movie, not you). And anyway, realize that there are plenty of people who go out by themselves and love it.
August 31st, 2009 at 6:29 am
I would suggest going for a small walk here and there. Then gradually doing tasks that seem harder. Just experiment with it, and push your limits. Don’t be afraid to go outside your safety bubble! Even if it’s just a little bit for a little while, then you’ll keep improving! =]
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August 31st, 2009 at 6:44 am
I’m about to turn 20, and I know exactly what you mean. I’m somewhat of a loner and often want to go out by myself and just get some coffee, hang out at the park, go eat, see a movie, or anything else that I feel I’ll get looked at strangely for if I’m alone. When I’m with friends, it’s fine, but going it alone is an entirely different story. I don’t know why I’m answering, because I can’t really offer relief. I just wanted to let you know that I deal with the same thing and you’re not alone (no pun intended).
My guess is that it would be easier to deal with being alone if you weren’t so aware of it. For example, if you were buried in a book or your mind was otherwise occupied to the extent that you weren’t constantly worried about other people noticing you’re alone. I try to feign confidence when I’m alone, because I feel like people won’t judge me as much. I’m not sure why their judgment matters, anyway. I guess you could soberly realize that death is truly eventually coming for all of us, allowing you to live your life and let go of things like this. It’s easier said than done, I definitely know.
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August 31st, 2009 at 6:58 am
Okay I get it but still I dont get it. I love to be by myself around strangers.. the atmosphere just makes me feel good, to sit somewhere and drink coffe and just look at all those people passing by. Then, I feel I am a part of something thats our society.
If someone pays attention to me it will not make me uncomfortable. The people next to me always sense how I feel and they automatically accept and like me being there. Because the energy is very positive.
Well I’m not here to talk about myself but I have no clear way of solving the problem. So instead I give you my point of view.
and my point is we like those who like us..
If you like the people around you, they will like you.
No one will care if you are alone,
they just like to be around you,
just for a moment, because after this,
they will never see you again.
I’m really serious about the positive energy. It attracts all kinds
of people with all kinds of silly questions. Just to share a moment and have a word with you.
But if you are around people and you feel like you dont want to be there. People will sense that and assume you have a problem with them. So, they wont really like you being there.
Feel comfortable around people and they will feel comfortable having you around. You know there really is love in the air,
you just have to grab it.
Dont judge anyone and no one will judge you.
Dont feel inferior, but dont feel superior either. Feel that you
and the people around you are equal. People will appreciate that.
Show respect, just be welcome and let your self feel good.
This is coming from a mad introvert, 19 years of a boy.
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August 31st, 2009 at 7:08 am
I’ll be a college freshman this fall. I’m also pretty much a loner. After eating at a restaurant and seeing a movie by myself, I’ve become much more confident about being by myself in public. A lot of people are uncomfortable with it at first, but, like everything else, practice makes perfect. Try walking in the park or seeing a movie (people will be focused on the movie, not you). And anyway, realize that there are plenty of people who go out by themselves and love it.
References :